If you saw me now, you would think I got mugged or was in a fight. What actually happened was I went to the dermatologist. Dr. Robert 'shakey" Schwartz. The man has hands like Katheryn Hepburn's head. You would think he is keeping time to some latin music. I know he can't help it and I know I shouldn't be joking about it, but the man was first waving this needle like a orchestra conductor and started sticking an area that had some excema. Blood pouring out, and he is still sticking away. Then if that wasn't enough, He grabs a more serious weapon, a scalpel. I think it was a switchblade scalpel,,, and he goes in for the kill like Toshiro Mifune in Kurosawa's film Seven Samurai. Or maybe like Zorro. He went for the forehead first, then slashed at my head. Waving the sword , I mean scalpel, my instinct was to duck or kick him in the nuts, but remembering he is my doctor and I'm actually paying for this abuse, I braved it. Blood all over, he had the medical assistant take a picture of it, I cant believe he is leaving evidence of this crime. A small band aid is put on my forehead, blood leaking thru it, and my head a bigger bandaid. The leg, forget about that , no bandage, the gauze was soaked with blood. I went to eat after and the waitress was staring at my wounds . When I got home to take a closer look, It was scary , it really looked like I was attacked.
I go back for more in 4 weeks. I think I'm going to wear my hockey gear.
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